Yes I am! Not something I usually do – blow my own trumpet. But I’m stoked that I actually drove people home from both parties last night.
So, with that positive reinforcement out of the way … 😉
AH gets me on Saturday for the boys’ soccer. Miss 5 stayed with uncle, which is sad as I’d love to see her, but, hell, I know where I’d rather be and it’s not on the cold sidelines. Get a hug from Master 10 and a ‘sorry for not coming to see you yesterday’.
AH informs me that he’s spoken with the P-decontaminators and it’s favourable that he can get his stuff out of the place (ie he’d cleaned the heatpump filters and vacuumed regularly, it had been repainted/recarpeted, hadn’t been in there long, no DVS system). Tells me he’s going to get new mattresses, go to the laundromat for the linen and dryclean all duvets. Doesn’t ask me how I feel about it. But I feel sick! What if there’s still contamination on the stuff? Do we risk it?! Conversation over.
It goes downhill with Master 10 when I say that I’m thinking of keeping the tablet because of his overreaction yesterday. ABOUT A TABLET! A piece of technology! When they have 2 in their possession! I’m actually impressed he’s putting up a fight about something … just wish it was an issue that had importance. He ends up saying “I want to stay at your place tonight Daddy. I don’t want to go to Mama’s”. I stay schtumm – I’m curious to see what AH says.
I’m pleasantly surprised by his answer: “No, it doesn’t work like that. You aren’t talking nice and hurting Mama’s feelings. We’ll talk about it later”. I wonder, if he wasn’t going to a party, would he have said the same thing.
I get dropped at MY place to goodbye hug from Master 8 (who got player of the day. Superstar!). Master 10 doesn’t even want to look at me. I felt I kept it all calm when I explained that, as a mum, there’s going to be many moments in our future when he’s not happy with me and I’m ok with that. He needs to work out why I’m saying/doing what I’m saying/doing. I can’t control what mood he comes back in, but hope he is able to see things differently.
The car stays at the bottom of the driveway for quite some time; eventually appears at the top with Master 10 getting out and saying, very red-eyed, “sorry for hurting your feelings”. So, AH had actually spoken with him further. I’m surprised.
Kids come back at 5 pm. AH disappears and I find him out the back of the property cutting rosemary. Hypocrite! Happy to say he’s not going to contribute to anything around the house, yet walks around taking stuff without the decency to ask.
None of them can finish their soups for dinner (lunch was Dominos at 2 pm). I’m considering pushing Saturday changeover to 6 pm and stipulating I get them back fed as this is the second week where they’ve had such a late lunch, they can’t eat what I’ve prepared. I’m amazed to hear that Friday’s dinner is takeaways from the Turkish again … have to ask if they’ve had anything homecooked and laugh when I got told “TOAST!”.
Kids are excited to hear my work colleague is babysitting. Head to first party, a 40th where no-one from my local clique will be. It’s good fun but not drinking much as have to head to the second party, where I know AH is. He’s on the dance floor by the time I get there. Notice his new threads – shame the dance moves haven’t been updated as well! The music is the same that’s been heard at too many parties … after the second play of Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” within half-an-hour, I find a willing participant to play pool. Get the call at 2 am from Master 8 that none of them have settled so finish my game and drive home … amazing many from the group that I was sober/responsible enough to do so.
Babysitter informs me that Master 10 opened up to her tonight. He’s being verbally bullied by a friend, J, the son of a AH’s colleague and one of my Friday drinking buddies. Calling him every name under the sun (MoFo, c***) and purposefully befriending people who Master 10 has made friends with, then turning them against Master 10. J’s happily teaching little kids all the swear words he knows too. I’m disappointed to hear he told AH about this the night of Master 8’s sleepover, yet neither said anything to me. AH’s advice: just ignore it and maybe make a sarcastic remark back (‘thanks for that’, ‘you’re too kind’). Really?! That’s it?! You’ve made our kids socialise together on a Friday evening at J’s house, yet not mentioned shit to his parents about what he’s doing to Master 10.
Finally get to bed – with Master 8 and Miss 5 already sprawled in it, I’m on the edge. Literally!
Have a lovely relaxed Sunday with the bairns. Miss 5 is a spoilt brat for a large part of the afternoon and it concerns me to hear her saying “I don’t love the boys. They don’t love me”. Wonder how much is coming from hearing me/AH saying they don’t love the other anymore. She’s not her normal self. Also very scared to sleep in her bed when she gets back from AH’s. This is real odd. She’s never had an issue until the past few weeks.
AH calls to say goodnight, but asks kids to call him back as he needs to go on the charger. NO! You’ve made me pay for all the costs coming out of this house, so I WILL NOT call you back. If the kids want to call you, that’s fine. But you pay for the calls you make. Again, 5 TIMES MY SALARY! ONLY PAYING ¼ OF IT FOR ME AND YOUR 3 KIDS 5/7 NIGHTS PER WEEK!!! Do the maths!
So I now have major concerns:
- the kids only seem to be eating takeaways, now that AH is flush with cash;
- he’s buying them new clothes (YAY!) but doesn’t wash them before putting them in them – ewww. Who does this?
- he’s not telling me when one of our kids confides in him;
- Miss 5 spent 2 hours on the tablet yesterday morning while the boys were at soccer. 2 HOURS!!!! 5 years old!?!?
- Master 10’s reaction to not having our tablet Fri/Sat, when they have two others;
- decontamination of what was in the P-house. Can’t it be tested to put minds at rest?
And, from the negatives, here’s my positives:
- Master 8 stepping up this afternoon and unpacking the groceries, and generally kicking ass!
- not losing at pool last night;
- Masters 8 and 10 laughing their butts off as the latter did homework: animals with weapons 🙂