Said goodbye to M11 this morning as he’s off on school camp for three nights. Hope the sun shines for him and he has a blast – he was fit to explode last night and this morning with excitement. Looking forward to just having the other two as he can really stir things up with Ms8 … and, no! She’s not innocent. She might just play the game a bit better!
No contact with AH today. He threw his toys yesterday so I went grey rock. M11 wanted his soccer tops that were at AH’s for camp. I said M11 could call to see if AH would drop them round. AH asked to speak to the others but as it was well past my 4-5pm call time and minutes off the 6:30 cut-off (as it upsets them) … and that they weren’t around so didn’t even know he was on the phone … M11 let him know I didn’t want him to.
Now Mr Narc believes I have put these boundaries in place to hurt him, and he can’t see any other side, as usual. I’ve read a few articles regarding the need to call kids every evening (there isn’t one) and contact in high conflict separations. This article spoke volumes: http://www.biffresponse.com/blog/boundaries-in-separation-and-divorce/ … and was the impetus between my implementing a set time for him to call when we went on holiday back in early October. Funnily enough, he chose to copy that and instructed that I, too, was only able to call between 4 and 5; despite not having any research to back it up. His impetus was, as always, spite.
It makes his texts utterly ridiculous. They weren’t hurting. They have all said they don’t want to speak to us every evening. He might be hurting but the kids, sure as hell, aren’t! He also seems to think that I’m not entitled to put boundaries in place in my house.
A typical reaction from a narcissist. A refusal to acknowledge boundaries.
What a buffoon!
Grateful for:
- no contact from AH;
- yoga; and
- getting some 1-on-1 time with Ms8, singing along to Lorde!
separation tears 